슈엔, XUAN.
Hey. Everything on the blog is just what shit I face once in a while. Don't mind me, venting my anger and saying things that i couldn't say in real. I can blabber all about me at here or you can just find out for yourself.

"Dreams. We got enough that we can fill the tank And even if we gotta' break the bank; You know we're gonna TURN IT UP,TURN IT UP, TURN IT UP."
EMPTY SPACE.
"I can be tough, I can be strong. But with you, it's not like that at all. There's a girl that gives a shit; Behind this wall, you just walk through it"
"Withering away,"
There's this terrible feeling growing inside me as I continue to grow older.
It's like the fear is slowly consuming me from within. 
It's scary how fast I am going to grow old and there's so little time to do what I want to do.
What will happen 5 years down the road? 
I'll probably find out in awhile.

I'm losing more friends as I grow older.
I'm starting to feel more weary about life.
I'm basically losing all the enthusiasm to have fun in general.
I wished I didn't grow old now that I did.


I'm starting to feel more alone as the day goes by.
Working out in the adult world is so freaky to me,
It's hard for someone so young to be able to blend into the office tbh.
I'm feeling like everybody is judging the way I act and dress.
Even though they probably don't notice my presence at all.
Just curious about that young temp staff in the corner.


I'm freaking out about my A level results.
I was never this scared for any exams at all.
Usually exams do not affect my future. At least not in a great way.
But this is different.
This is THE A levels.
There's no turning back.

I wish and pray so hard that I wouldn't screw up my Chemistry.
I wish and pray I would do at least well enough to have a choice about my future course.
I wish and pray I can get through all this bullshit.


I wish and pray I had bestfriend(s).
I wish and pray that somebody would listen to me.
I wish and pray that someone would care enough to ask me how I was.
But nobody is genuinely caring. 
They only care about themselves.
They only look for me when they had no one else to look for.
They forget about me once they find new and better friends. 
I guess I was destined to be alone for now.
Until I find someone willing to tolerate all my bullshit.
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